Portrait of a Godly Wife | Part 1
In this episode, we explore the portrait of a Godly wife through the lens of 1 Peter 3:1-6. Sam unpacks what it truly means for a wife to be a helper to her husband and tackles the misconceptions of the word submission. With humor, relatable stories, and biblical wisdom, this episode is insightful and offers a fresh perspective on a topic that challenges and inspires.
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Transcript
Welcome to the Fortifying youg Family podcast.
Speaker A:It can be daunting to navigate through an anti marriage and family culture.
Speaker A:Our teacher will expound biblical principles to help fortify our families and keep these sacred institutions strong.
Speaker A:And now, here's this week's teaching from Sam Wood.
Speaker B:Well, we're going to continue tonight with where we started off this morning and all the men said amen, okay?
Speaker B:And so this morning we talked about, and I tried to give you a portrait of a godly husband from First Peter chapter three in verse seven.
Speaker B:And I mentioned several pictures of that husband this morning.
Speaker B:A husband who still has time for his wife, lives with her, spends time with her according to understanding and knowledge.
Speaker B:We talked about what that looked like.
Speaker B:And then we talked about a husband who honors his wife as a weaker vessel and what that meant.
Speaker B:And because he was doing this, because he was obeying the Word of God and living as a husband, a godly husband should, according to the word of God, then his prayers would not be hindered.
Speaker B:He could still touch heaven with his prayers.
Speaker B:And so I hope you'll keep that in mind tonight as we continue to look at this passage in First Peter, chapter three.
Speaker B:And we look again at verse one.
Speaker B:And tonight I want to look at verse one down through verse six and look at the picture, the beautiful picture that Peter again paints with the brush strokes of the Word of God on the canvas of the Bible.
Speaker B:Picture of a godly wife, a picture of a godly lady.
Speaker B:And so let's look at that careful tonight as we look at Scripture.
Speaker B:Turn with me to First Peter chapter three and I'll read the first six verses and then we'll have a word of prayer.
Speaker B:Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives, while the behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear whose adorning.
Speaker B:Let it not be that outward adorning of the plaiting of hair, and of wearing of gold, or putting on of apparel, but let it be the hidden man of the heart, and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and a quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
Speaker B:For after this manner, in the old time, the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands.
Speaker B:Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him, lord, whose daughters ye are, as long as you do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
Speaker B:Let me, as I get started here tonight, and try to unpack these six verses tonight, as we look at a portrait of a godly wife, remind you again of what I said this morning concerning the roles of the husband and wife.
Speaker B:Because I think it bears repeating again in the day in the culture that we live in.
Speaker B:And that is the differentiated roles that we see in the Bible for the husband and wife were corrupted, not created by the fall, they were created by God.
Speaker B:That is, they're not cultural, they are creational.
Speaker B:God has not changed his mind in light of the culture that we live in, the day and time that we live in concerning the role of the husband and the role of the wife.
Speaker B:So we might ask the question tonight, what is a God assigned role of the wife?
Speaker B:As we get started in First Peter chapter one and chapter three and look at verse one, I want to draw your attention for just a moment back to the original marriage relationship in Genesis chapter 2 and verse 18 and remind you of the words that God says in verse 18 where he says, and the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone.
Speaker B:Then notice what he says here.
Speaker B:He says, I will make him help meet for him.
Speaker B:There's so much in this verse, really I could really preach.
Speaker B:Probably three or four messages just on this verse.
Speaker B:Debbie knows that.
Speaker B:She's laughing.
Speaker B:There's really so much in this verse.
Speaker B:But I just want to look at this for just a moment as before we dive into First Peter chapter three, because I think it's very important to see and understand a few things concerning this verse.
Speaker B:God said it's not good that man would be what church alone.
Speaker B:So to eliminate loneliness in man's life, God said, I'm going to create.
Speaker B:I'm going to make someone.
Speaker B:He calls that person a help meet for him.
Speaker B:Very interesting words there that he calls, as we know, this companion that God would bring to man to eliminate loneliness in his life.
Speaker B:He calls her a help meet.
Speaker B:Now I want to look at those two words just for a moment as we get started tonight.
Speaker B:The first word is help.
Speaker B:What does it mean when God says, I will make a help meet for him?
Speaker B:Look at the first word, help.
Speaker B:The word help is often in the Hebrew, a word that describes God himself.
Speaker B:Many places in scripture, especially as we look in the Psalms, it says that God is our help and our shield, or God is a very present help in a time of need.
Speaker B:That same word, the little Hebrew word ezer e z e r is used there.
Speaker B:And it's also used here for this companion that is woman, that would be a help to man.
Speaker B:And it means someone who comes beside you, who enables you and empowers you to do something.
Speaker B:Certainly God is our help.
Speaker B:He's someone who comes to us, he enables us, and he empowers us.
Speaker B:I think of another instance of this in 1st Samuel chapter 7.
Speaker B:Because in 1st Samuel chapter 7, the Philistines have fought a battle with the Israelites.
Speaker B:And the Israelites lose this battle and then they confess and repent before God.
Speaker B:They fight another battle with the Philistines and they have a great victory.
Speaker B:And they take some stones and they pile them one on top of another in the river, and they call these stones this.
Speaker B:They said, this is our Ebenezer E Z E R Eben Ezer.
Speaker B:And what that means is God is our rock of help.
Speaker B:And so they pile the stones in this stream.
Speaker B:And every time they would see those stones, it would remind them that God was the one who was a rock of help to them in winning that battle over the Philistines.
Speaker B:It's very interesting that God uses this little word, help.
Speaker B:I'm taking a few minutes because I think this is important to understand.
Speaker B:That's your wife that God has given to you, sir, tonight.
Speaker B:God gave her to you to be a help to you.
Speaker B:That is, someone who comes beside you, someone who empowers you, someone who enables you in the calling that God has upon your life.
Speaker B:That's the word help.
Speaker B:And we could say a lot more about it, but let me just stop right there tonight.
Speaker B:Then look at the word meet.
Speaker B:God said, I'm going to make a help meet, he says, for him, for Adam, for the first man.
Speaker B:That word meet is a very interesting word, too.
Speaker B:The word meet means like, opposite.
Speaker B:Very interesting.
Speaker B:I'm going to make someone who will come beside man, who will empower him, who would enable him.
Speaker B:And the calling that I've given in his life to him, that will be like opposite him.
Speaker B:And that's a very interesting description.
Speaker B:Now, if someone's going to be like.
Speaker B:Let me just say this to begin with.
Speaker B:If someone's going to be like, opposite you, they're not like you.
Speaker B:They're like you, but they're opposite you.
Speaker B:You say, what in the world does that mean?
Speaker B:Well, it doesn't mean another man.
Speaker B:Another man wouldn't be like opposite.
Speaker B:So let me just point that out tonight, okay?
Speaker B:Like opposite.
Speaker B:It's kind of like a puzzle.
Speaker B:And you see the picture there on the PowerPoint, I think it kind of describes it.
Speaker B:You see two pieces of a puzzle.
Speaker B:For those two pieces of the puzzle to fit together, they Got to be of the same puzzle.
Speaker B:They got to come out of the same box or else they won't fit together.
Speaker B:So man and woman are both made in the image of God.
Speaker B:As I said this morning, we're equal in essence, but we're different in function.
Speaker B:So there's like each other.
Speaker B:But for those two pieces of puzzle to fit together in that puzzle, they have to be opposite in some way too, to fit together.
Speaker B:They can't be just alike.
Speaker B:So God is saying, I'm going to make someone who is a helper to him, who enables him, empowers him, but is like opposite him.
Speaker B:And certainly if you look in Genesis chapter two, and we won't take time to go all the way down through this passage tonight.
Speaker B:But when God created woman and brought her to Adam, to man, Adam, when he saw her, he was very excited.
Speaker B:He said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.
Speaker B:She shall be called woman because she was what taken out of man.
Speaker B:And what Adam is saying, actually that's a song in the Hebrew.
Speaker B:He actually sang this as a song.
Speaker B:He was so excited when he saw her that she was like him, but he was excited she wasn't exactly like him.
Speaker B:And he was very excited about the differences in the way that she wasn't like him.
Speaker B:She was like him, but opposite him.
Speaker B:And Adam saw that God had made someone to come beside him, to be a companion to him, to enable and empower him.
Speaker B:A wonderful gift from God to bring woman beside him who would be like him but but yet opposite him.
Speaker B:So what type of woman does it take to carry out this role of being a help?
Speaker B:Meet as you look at First Peter, chapter three.
Speaker B:Peter paints us, I believe, as I want to share with you tonight, five portraits of a godly wife.
Speaker B:Now I'm going to spend a lot of time on the first one, so don't get scared.
Speaker B:If you look at your watch and you say man, he spent that much time on the first one, he's got five more to go.
Speaker B:We're going to be here at 9 o'clock, so don't worry about that.
Speaker B:It's just a.
Speaker B:The first point bears spending some time on.
Speaker B:So I want to paint to you tonight from the word of God, as Peter shows us this from the word of God, five portraits of a beautiful godly wife.
Speaker B:Here's the first one, verse one.
Speaker B:She's a wife who submits to her own husband.
Speaker B:She's a wife who submits to her own husband.
Speaker B:Look at verse one.
Speaker B:Likewise, you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands that if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation.
Speaker B:That word conversation is important to understand, means the conduct of the wife.
Speaker B:Now, first note, the command is addressed to whom?
Speaker B:The command is addressed to the wife.
Speaker B:The command is not addressed to the husband.
Speaker B:And that's very significant because nowhere does scripture command a husband to force his wife to submit to him.
Speaker B:A lot of husbands try to make their wife submit to them, but the command is to the wife.
Speaker B:The command is not to the husband.
Speaker B:The responsibility to obey this command is given entirely to solely to the wife.
Speaker B:She's instructed to submit to her husband.
Speaker B:And notice, just like in verse seven, as I said this morning, the first word in verse one is likewise.
Speaker B:And that's very significant.
Speaker B:It's very important to see and understand.
Speaker B:He starts again, we see with this word likewise.
Speaker B:And this refers back to what has been said in the previous chapter, what has been said in chapter two, where Peter instructs all Christians to submit to different authorities.
Speaker B:In fact, briefly, let me just say here tonight, in verses 13 through 17, if you want to go back and read it later, in chapter two, he's talking about Christians submitting to civil government.
Speaker B:And then he goes in verse 18 through verse 20 and talks about employees are to submit to their supervisors even when they're treated unfairly.
Speaker B:In verses 21 through 25, we see the ultimate example of submission, where Jesus Christ submitted to the death on the cross, even though he was cursed, even though he was threatened, even though he was railed.
Speaker B:He did not retaliate, but submitted to the Father who judges righteously.
Speaker B:So Peter has just said these things about submission.
Speaker B:Then he comes to chapter three and verse one and says, likewise, referring back to what he's just said, likewise, ye wives, in the same manner as shown in chapter two, submit to your own husbands.
Speaker B:So Peter is saying, look at all the previous examples of submissions.
Speaker B:And he exhorts the wife, do likewise.
Speaker B:So in looking at this, it's important that we see and ask some questions.
Speaker B:Who is the wife to submit to in that verse?
Speaker B:It says they're to submit to their own husband.
Speaker B:To their own husband.
Speaker B:It doesn't say the wife is to submit to every man.
Speaker B:It says they're to submit to their own husband.
Speaker B:And it's very important that we see that now.
Speaker B:Every wife's husband is unique and has unique needs that that wife is submitting to every different man has a different calling upon his life that God has given to him.
Speaker B:So the wife has to understand the calling of God upon her husband's life so that she understands how to submit to the unique needs of her husband.
Speaker B:For example, Debbie being my wife, I'm in ministry full time.
Speaker B:She submits in a different way, we might say.
Speaker B:Then Tommy Lee submits to Kendall, who is a sheep herder.
Speaker B:I don't know how he wants to describe himself or an antique dealer.
Speaker B:Okay?
Speaker B:So Tommy has different submission issues than Debbie has because they're husbands, that is Kendall, myself, we are different, okay?
Speaker B:And you know, that's very, very important that we see and understand.
Speaker B:So I'm just trying to give some things about this that are very, very important.
Speaker B:Now this brings up the big, the big question, just what is submission then?
Speaker B:What does it mean to submit?
Speaker B:Well, the word in the Greek is hubitasso, and it means to voluntarily place oneself under the authority of someone out of devotion.
Speaker B:It's when someone, the wife places herself under the authority, the God given authority of the husband out of devotion to him.
Speaker B:So God instructs the wife to voluntarily place herself under the headship, her being the body, him being the head of her husband.
Speaker B:And she doesn't do this out of duty.
Speaker B:She is to do this out of an attitude of devotion to her husband.
Speaker B:In fact, let me point out, it's a very different word than the word obey in scripture where it talks about a child obeying their parents.
Speaker B:And that word in the Greek is hupakuo.
Speaker B:And it means to line up under the authority of someone out of duty.
Speaker B:It's a difference in attitude.
Speaker B:A child lines up under the authority of their parents out of duty.
Speaker B:A wife lines up under the authority of her husband out of devotion to him and the position that God put him in.
Speaker B:Now this word hupitasso is a military type word because it's talking about like the rank of a soldier lining up under an officer.
Speaker B:But the non military use of the word hupitasso means a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating or assuming responsibility in order to carry out a burden.
Speaker B:And it really pictures a team.
Speaker B:It pictures teamwork, we might say.
Speaker B:I believe one commentator correctly states it this way.
Speaker B:He says submission is the divine calling of a wife to honor and affirm her husband's leadership and help carry it out according to her gifts that God has given to her.
Speaker B:We see this command in Titus chapter 2 and verse 5 that I read this morning.
Speaker B:And let me just say there, In Titus chapter 2 and verse 5, it says that the older women are to.
Speaker B:It uses the word teach the younger women to obey their husbands.
Speaker B:But if you look back in the Greek, that word obey is the same word is used here that means to submit or hupetaso.
Speaker B:Then also it's used in Ephesians chapter 5 and verse 22 in the classic text on marriage.
Speaker B:It's used in a parallel text in Colossians chapter three and verse 18.
Speaker B:And then here again we see it in first Peter chapter three and verse one.
Speaker B:Now, this brings up another question.
Speaker B:That is, whose idea was it, this thing of submission?
Speaker B:Just whose idea was this anyway?
Speaker B:Is this a conspiracy that was derived over the centuries by chauvinistic men?
Speaker B:That's what some people think.
Speaker B:That's what the world thinks today.
Speaker B:That's certainly what feminists think.
Speaker B:Did Paul and Peter just randomly come up with this idea of submission?
Speaker B:Well, I think it's important to understand that this was not Paul's idea.
Speaker B:This was not Peter's idea.
Speaker B:This was no man's idea.
Speaker B:This idea originated with God himself.
Speaker B:This was God's idea from the beginning.
Speaker B:Theologian Wayne Grudem says this.
Speaker B:He says the idea of headship and submission never began.
Speaker B:It has always existed in the eternal nature of God himself.
Speaker B:And I'll elaborate on that in a minute.
Speaker B:It's always existed in the eternal nature character of the Trinity of God.
Speaker B:Submission by a wife is an act of faith as she places herself under the headship of her husband out of an attitude of devotion.
Speaker B:This brings up a third question I want to answer tonight.
Speaker B:That is, does submission Inferior.
Speaker B:Inferiority.
Speaker B:Now, let me just remind you of Genesis, chapter one and verse 27.
Speaker B:God created man.
Speaker B:It says in his own image, the image of God created he him.
Speaker B:Male and female created he them.
Speaker B:Again, as I said earlier in the message, I said it this morning and I'll say it again tonight.
Speaker B:It's important we understand that men and women, there's no inferiority between a man and woman.
Speaker B:They're equal in essence.
Speaker B:Both are image bearers of God.
Speaker B:Equal in essence, but different function that God has given to us.
Speaker B:Let me give you an example from Scripture of this, alluding back to Grudem's statement I just gave you a while ago.
Speaker B:Look at First Corinthians, chapter 11 and verse 3.
Speaker B:Very interesting passage.
Speaker B:But I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ.
Speaker B:The head of the woman is the man.
Speaker B:So we see a order here.
Speaker B:We see a divine hierarchy placed by God here.
Speaker B:Christ is the head of man, man is the head of woman.
Speaker B:But look at the end of verse three.
Speaker B:And the head of Christ is who Is God?
Speaker B:Is Jesus God?
Speaker B:That's not a hard question.
Speaker B:Is Jesus God?
Speaker B:I hope you believe Jesus is God.
Speaker B:Jesus is God.
Speaker B:Jesus is part of the trinity of God, and Jesus is God.
Speaker B:God the Father is God, the Holy Spirit is God.
Speaker B:But yet in this verse it says the head of Christ is God.
Speaker B:That is in the divine order, in the divine hierarchy of time.
Speaker B:God the Father is the head of God the Son, but both of them are equally God.
Speaker B:God the Father and Jesus are both equally God.
Speaker B:Both equally God, we might say, equal in essence, but different again in function.
Speaker B:And again, the husband and wife, both image bearers of God.
Speaker B:Equal in essence, but again, different in God.
Speaker B:Ordained function, you say.
Speaker B:Isn't it demeaning somewhat to call the wife a helper or a helpmeet, as we said a while ago, is that demeaning to say that she is a helper?
Speaker B:Well, if you think of the meaning of the word in the terms of, say, my sons, when I was building my house over here at Mission Point, and I would look at Josh when he was small and say, josh, be a good little helper.
Speaker B:Be Daddy's little helper and go get the hammer.
Speaker B:If I look at that word in that light, it would seem somewhat demeaning.
Speaker B:But I tried to explain to you a while ago that it's not demeaning at all.
Speaker B:In fact, that word help is a word that God uses even for himself.
Speaker B:Someone who empowers, someone who enables, someone who comes beside and completes.
Speaker B:Let me give you an example of this, and this will be a, I'm sure, a very familiar example concerning where we live here in Tennessee, and that is of Peyton Manning.
Speaker B:How many of you have heard of Peyton Manning?
Speaker B:We live in Tennessee.
Speaker B:Peyton Manning, I mean, probably one of the greatest quarterbacks, no doubt, who's ever lived.
Speaker B:One of the most intellectual quarterbacks who's ever lived.
Speaker B:When Peyton Manning played on his national football team, he made more money than the coach.
Speaker B:In fact, the last time I saw his contract, several years ago when he was still playing, I think he signed a contract, I was thinking, for over $90 million.
Speaker B:I can't even imagine that kind of money, somebody being worth that kind of money.
Speaker B:I don't think his coach made as much money as he did.
Speaker B:His coach probably didn't make nowhere near the money that he did.
Speaker B:Again, he's recognized as one of the greatest offensive minds in the game of football.
Speaker B:But yet, even though he knew a lot about football, he was making more money than his coach, made more talented at the position than his Coach was.
Speaker B:He submitted to the authority of the coach for the good of the team that he was on.
Speaker B:But yet the coach, at times when he would go to the line of scrimmage and he would audible out of a play, maybe the coach called.
Speaker B:The coach trusted him enough that he could audible out of that play and call some other play.
Speaker B:If he thought the defense looked different than what they thought originally it was going to be so that they could have success on that play.
Speaker B:But he still would stick to the coach's overall game plan.
Speaker B:He submitted to the coach.
Speaker B:He wasn't inferior to the coach.
Speaker B:He wasn't superior to the coach, neither was the coach to him.
Speaker B:I think it's a good picture we might see of the submission of a wife with her husband for the good of the team that is their marriage and the good of their family and husbands.
Speaker B:Let me just stop here and give you a word here tonight.
Speaker B:You're a foolish husband if you don't consider and listen to the wisdom of your wife, because your wife has a lot of insight and a lot of wisdom that you don't have.
Speaker B:That's why you need to have a helper.
Speaker B:We men need a lot of help.
Speaker B:I'm so thankful for my wife.
Speaker B:I'm so thankful.
Speaker B:I see things one way.
Speaker B:She sees things sometimes a very different way.
Speaker B:I mean, if I'm going to make a decision about something, I gather all the facts, I gather all the information, and I look at all the facts and information and try to make a very logical decision.
Speaker B:But I might present these facts and this information to Debbie, and I'll say, debbie, I think this is what we ought to do.
Speaker B:This is what the facts say we ought to do.
Speaker B:This is what the information says we ought to do.
Speaker B:And.
Speaker B:But Debbie then will pause sometimes and say this.
Speaker B:I know, Sam, that's what the facts say.
Speaker B:I know that's what the information says.
Speaker B:But I just don't have a good.
Speaker B:What?
Speaker B:I don't have a good feeling about that.
Speaker B:Now in my male brain, I'm thinking, what difference does that make?
Speaker B:Having a good feeling about it?
Speaker B:This is what the facts say.
Speaker B:This is what the information says.
Speaker B:But most of the time, I can think back over the last 40 years when she didn't have a good feeling about it.
Speaker B:She was right.
Speaker B:Oh, y'all have experienced this, too.
Speaker B:She was right.
Speaker B:So I say, guys, you're really missing out, and you're not a very wise husband if you don't listen to the insight and wisdom of your wife.
Speaker B:You have listened to the first part of a two part message by Evangelist Sam Wood.
Speaker A:Thank you for joining the Fortifying youg Family podcast.
Speaker A:And if you feel encouraged by today's teaching, give us a follow so we can invite you back and share us on your socials so more marriages and families can be strengthened and fortified through the truths of God's Word.
Speaker A:Remember, fortifying your family starts with a strong belief in God's Word.
